Its really not the office environment anymore - something else is bothering me now. I'm the kind of person that can blend in anytime I want because in case you didn't know, I am the greatest pretender. In fact, I've made new friends already at the tech department. Of course it is still hard to mingle with the 'veterans' so I just stick with the semi-neophytes. For the tech, there's Jeff. For Billing, there's the two Lizas. Jeff has been around for a month already so he knows almost everyone there. But still, he's not the talkative type so it's a little less awkward when I'm around him. When I'm hanging out with Gerald, my other buddy who talks a lot with other people often, I feel uncomfortable because I always get left out of their conversations. Jeff's right, during my first week, I'll have the feeling that I'm an 'extra' - following people around, trying to set an identity. And even more unfortunately for me, most of the people I know are on a different shift, including Jeff. But who cares. Mingling with other people is really not that important to me. I'll get to see my COEB friends again this Saturday anyway. Hey Corinne, there's really something wrong with that ****** girl... hehe...
I met Teddy last night. And I don't like him as my buddy. Don't get me wrong... he's nice and intelligent and all, but he's very busy. He's answering calls almost every time and he leaves me struggling to match his pace. And I barely get to ask him questions. He's a Tier 2 (tech support guru) so almost everyone on the floor is asking him questions too. I'm really having a hard time because he's not giving me the proper introduction. And being the fast learner that I am (naks!), I'm still struggling in the dark. I don't even know how to use the basic tools! I don't know how to gain access to our UNIX shell using our thin clients, I don't know the databases that we use, and I don't even have a certibiz (our logs) account! And he expects me to take my first call tonight! It's only my second day!
As I've said, it is not the office environment anymore. It's the job itself. I'm very uneasy every time I go to work. I'm always nervous when I'm pressured to do something I'm not good at. In this case, speaking English with an accent. Heck! I can program a password authentication software using any language in just 10 minutes but when it comes to this... Its a little way off of my skills.
Sabi nga nila, sayang naman yung kakayahan ko kung ganto lang gagawin ko. Instead of focusing on technical knowledge, I have to focus instead on what? English accent? And the fact that I get nervous everyday because of this also doesn't help.
Next Monday, I'll be having a second chance at Trend. I didn't get to take the test before because I had to study for our stupid training. I should have followed Marcos' advise then. That test was more important than our training. Look at him now, he's earning 15K at Ambergis because he chose to fail our stupid training.
ANG TAGAL NG 15! Ang tagal pa ng sweldo ko! 6:00pm naaaaaaa papasok nanaman akooooo. LINTEK!