happy nightmares

Why is it that every time I get scary dreams, I wake up happy. Yesterday, I woke up to rather unusual "nightmare." It wasn't about ghosts or zombies (my favorite), but instead it was a psychological thriller which felt like a cross between "The Usual Suspects" and "The Silence of the Lambs." Like most of my dreams, I've forgotten what it was about even if I've repeatedly told myself to remember the details. I still can't remember what made it special until now. I just remember that in the end, I realized that I made a wrong assumption in the beginning which created a ripple effect that affected the whole plot - much like the mistake of letting Keyser Soze walk out of the investigation in "The Usual Suspects." (If you haven't seen that film, I suggest you watch it as soon as you can. That's one of the best movies I've seen.)

Anyway, maybe I should keep a dream journal. I can probably get a good script out of those dreams. Also, I'm 90% sure that I dream in color which means I've got a good imagination (or is it I'm creative?) There was even a time when I dreamt of solving hard puzzles - in color. Top that!

I'm now looking forward to whatever it is that I'd be dreaming of tonight.

holy sh*t movie scenes

I watched Insidious again. Since I was trying to cut down on horror movies for the past few years, I never got to watch this movie from start to finish. The only time I saw the whole film was when I was hanging out in my parent's room, soldering something I can't remember, with Ma and Dad watching it. Coincidentally, that was also Dad's last night. That was the last movie he ever saw before he died the next morning.

Anyway, even after watching it for a few more times after, there is this one scene that never fails to scare the hell out of me. It was the scene with the guy pacing back and forth by the window right after the mother woke up from her bad dream. It was effing crazy the first time I saw it and it still give me the creeps even upto now. It also doesn't help that I sleep by a large window as well. I tried searching for a clip of it in YouTube but the only one posted has really bad video quality. The clip in YouTube was a recording of a TV playing the scene which kinda took away the eerie effects.

I have had other holy sh*t moments in horror movies - like the scene with the gun-wielding kid in "The 6th Sense," the elevator scene in the original "The Eye," and the dropping-the-keys-while-the-spooky-guy-is-coming-at-you scene in "Sigaw" - but I think this one trumps them all. I suggest you watch Insidious and let me know if I'm right about it being scary. Hehe...

Good night and sweet dreams!

purpose of [this blog’s] being

Everyone loves it when other people read their blogs. I admit that I do too. It may not seem like it but I like the attention that I’m getting from it even if it’s coursed through a static webpage.

However, this doesn’t necessarily mean that I like to talk about what I write. The reason why I keep a blog is because sometimes I feel much more comfortable offloading my emotions on a webpage rather than talking about it with friends and family. Some things are just better off un-discussed (if there is even such a word). Besides, if I wanted a discussion, I would have gone with Facebook. Nothing there gets by unnoticed.

So, if you are reading this, please do continue reading my posts or come back whenever you feel like it. Don’t ever feel obliged to check up on me every time I post something weird, emotional, or even creepy because it’ll just be very awkward for the both of us. You can tell me however that you read my blog often and that you admire my really complex mind and that I’m really such a praise-worthy person and all that. Haha... just kidding.

new year

It's our first new year without Dad. My mom requested that we celebrate the new year far from home. She fears that she will only get sad seeing the places where Dad usually stayed at. It was suggested that we spend New Year's Eve at my brother's new place - a unit at the 5th floor of a condo-ish apartment in the city. There we will have a good view of the metro's fireworks display. It was a good idea, however, there are no lifts there yet. My grandmother will have a hard time going up the stairs. Grandma proposed that half of us go there while the rest stayed at the family house. Of course it's a bit against the usual Filipino tradition for families to spend the new year together (and remain a strong unit throughout the entire year, according to superstition), so most of us agreed to following urban legends leaving us here, at home, complete.

Dad will still be celebrating with us but my mom needs not worry. We will just create new, happier memories of the new year for her. We've set up our house to look 'zen' - with the lights, ambiance and all. I'm sure Dad will appreciate the effort we've done to help Ma recover.

Happy new year to everyone!

Here are some really ugly pictures taken from our grilling station.

Yeah, I know, my Tab doesn't take good low-light pictures. It sucks monkey balls. And yes, we are grilling barbeques in the dark.

mobile

Does this thing work? I'm posting this from the Blogger Android app that I've downloaded. The official app is not available for users outside the US so, yes, I got this from my usual shady sources.

I hope this post gets published correctly.

What happens if I attach a picture here? Hmm...

omega pain

menthol liniment + eyes = fun

I’ve got perpetual back pains so I always keep a liniment handy. When my back ached last night for some unknown reason, I reached for the ointment and applied it on the problematic area. Being the absentminded fool that I am, I also accidentally used the same hand to rub an itching eye afterwards.

The liniment did work on alleviating my back pain because all I ever felt was the hot burning sensation (and minty fresh coolness) on my left eye.

And no, I didn’t cry. I don’t cry. Ever.

everybody wants to be a chef

How many people do you know wants to be a chef – or at the very least, wants to learn how to cook?  I know a lot. I’m not sure if it’s just with my network of friends but it seems like cooking has been a ‘frustration’ for most of us. Our desire to learn how to cook may be drawn from necessity to feed ourselves, from curiosity to explore what we are capable of, or even from obsessive behavior to just be good at something.

Although my reason doesn’t really fit into any of those stereotypes, I may categorize myself along with those who needs to learn how to cook to fend for themselves. My reason is simple. I love to eat. A lot. Unfortunately, I don’t have that much money to be always buying takeaways from fancy restaurants. So, like any cheapskate would do, I try to make my own gourmet food. 

Over the weekend, I’ve been craving for burgers.

Hmmm… Burgers…

There was a time when I was experimenting on some chicken burger patties that I scavenged off my parent’s freezer and I was able to create something H.I.D-like (H.I.D is a food joint that sells great chicken burgers) by simply adding cajun spices, steak sauce, and some other stuff that I don’t really remember. I don’t usually document my ingredients for I like to think of myself as a prodigy who can magically make food taste better without following measurements or recipes. Haha… Anyway, I wanted to recreate that masterpiece so I went to the grocery to look for those chicken burger patties and to buy some spices. But since the nearest grocery that we have is just a small supermarket, I had very limited options. The only spices available on the shelves are the basic ones, and the only available meat are those pre-processed, ready-to-cook beef burger patties. Since I’m really itching to make burgers, I bought some really cheap pepper steak marinade, some spices, and three variants of those locally made ‘ulam-burger-type’ patties.

As soon as I got home, I thawed the meat, added both the spices and the marinade, and sprinkled over some Worcestershire sauce. It really smelled great when it was on the griller so I was really excited. Well, you may have already guessed what happened next. Once it was done, I took an itsy-bitsy portion from one of the patties to taste it and as soon as it touched my tongue, I was coughing like crazy from all the spices and from the saltiness of the marinade.

I think I may have discovered the recipe for rat poison.

Oh, well… I should have just bought fast food with the money that I had.  Disappointed, I nibbled on a piece of bread that’s topped with tuna spread.

frivolity

In my quest to discover the things that I’m good at, I decided to spend time in gaming again. I had a phase wherein  I abstained from playing games because I had the notion that it was just wasting my life. Back in 2008, I was jobless (by choice) and I spent the whole year playing World of Warcraft. Of course after that year, I was like “what the hell happened?” But now, when I think about it, I can consider that as one of my happiest years – alongside my binge-drinking and PS-playing years in college. I didn’t have lots of money but I was having fun.

Yeah, I know, still, everything needs to be taken in moderation. I wish I have more time for playing games.

* * * 

You must be a nerd to understand this part.

I’m now officially a fan of the Uncharted series of games for the PS3. I just spent my 5 days of medical leave (courtesy of my literally twisted spine) playing Uncharted 2: Among Thieves and I think I may want to spend some more VLs for finishing the game in ‘crushing hard’ mode. It’s THAT effing good.

The intro alone was EPIC. I was almost pounding on the controls just to get Drake (the protagonist) to jump away from the falling rock – which I later figured out was beyond the player’s control.

 

My favorite part was when those mutated bluish monsters were terrorizing the hell out of Drake, Chloe and Elena late in the game. It took me like almost 50 tries just to kill one of them in hard mode. Haha… loser.

* * *

“(Laughs) Cute.”

3 decades

Yeah. It’s been that long. Three decades of eccentricity.

* * *

I’m looking forward to a better 2011. Next year will be my lucky year. I just know it.

Merry Christmas and a happy new year to everyone. Please do make sure you enjoy the holidays. I’m off to do my last minute Christmas shopping. I hope there’s not a lot of people at the malls – haha, such wishful thinking. 

‘hedgehog concept’ this!

You know what I should do? I should focus all these emo sh*t energies into something more productive. I’ve yet to figure out how but I promise that I will try my best to come up with something that’s therapeutic (aside from blogging) at the least.

2010 just brought out the worst in me. It’s time for another paradigm shift.

Paradigm. Haha… I finished college without ever knowing how to pronounce this word.

Anyway, let me just pile these skeletons first in my closet before I bring out my drawing board of unfulfilled dreams. Haha… Emo sh*t kicking in again… must… resist…

If my brother can hear me now, he would probably say: “Why haven’t you killed yourself yet? Nevermind, you’ll probably just do it wrong anyway.” Haha… This is how we usually let each other know that we care.

* * *

2011. With the new year comes a new set of resolutions. Surprisingly, I was able to complete my resolution for 2010 – it was to get rid of my beer belly. No, I don’t have a six pack yet, I just got rid of the extra flab on my abdominal area. I actually needed to do this to keep my back from hurting. Speaking of six packs, I don’t like having toned abs – it reminds me of cockroaches. I don’t know why, but it does. Ewww.

I know! This year, I’ll try boxing. I’ll practice my punches so that the next time I see this certain someone, I can punch his face off with an uppercut (complete with a follow-through, a la Tiger Uppercut).

I know, I know, quitting the emo crap. Sigh. This is already a resolution on its own.

prime ribs and strong bones

It’s official. This is my worst year yet. And this post proves it.

I only blog when something bothers me. Blogging is something I do whenever I want to vent out frustrations or just want to keep myself distracted from all the crazy things happening around me. This year now has the most number of posts.

To the people who became part of my life this year, this post is dedicated to you. Thank you for making me stronger. I wish that you can also have the chance to be stronger these next few years.

* * *

Anyway, enough of this emo sh*t. Haha…

I can’t wait for Norman to get back home. I want may games! I asked him to buy used PS3 games in the US and I can’t wait to get my hands on them. I also plan on taking him to a buffet dinner for my birthday so I’m also excited for that. Prime ribs… hmmm...

think happy thoughts

I’ve had the best dream last night. I was so happy that I woke up smiling. Not wanting to end the joy, I willed myself to sleep again and tried to pick up where my dream left off. Surprisingly, it worked. I felt bliss for another 30 minutes.

Then I was late for work.

the script

“…for the first time… ooOooh Ooooh ooOoooh…”

Still good. Better even. This band’s got talent.

the making of a psycho

Some people just know how to write good stuff. I wish I could be like them.

I chanced upon (by cyber-stalking, haha…) a blog of a friend of a friend. Curious as always, I read one post.  The next thing I knew, I’ve read them all. Some people are just naturally talented in writing. Psychopathic as it may sound, I felt like I knew this person afterwards. I may have injected in my subconscious that we are actually friends. (Cue psycho music…)

* * *

I got a copy of Lee DeWyze’s new album (please don’t laugh), and I think I like it. I filed it under my feel-good-sunny-Sunday-morning-sounds playlist. I need a break from my usual angst-filled grunge music. I need to smile from time to time.

live, live…

Live. I’ve always been a fan of Windows Live Writer. After trying it out, I got used to it and now, I can’t post without it. This is one highly-recommended freeware. Although it works the same as the blogger editor, I like how I can write posts offline and save them as documents. Today, I just found out that the 2011 version is already available for download. If you are using the older versions, I suggest you switch the new one now. This one has ribbons and better template rendering.

* * *

Live. Live like today is your last day on Earth. I got that from a commercial for one of Angelina Jolie’s older movies showing on some cable channel. After hearing that line, I imagined how nice it would be to do just that. Maybe I should try it out… will I be able pull it off? Haha…

Still, I thought of how nice it would be to be able to tell you how I really feel about you. If today is my last day, I want to tell you everything and everything that is on my mind without hesitations or without thinking of the consequences.

Live. Yeah, live like we’re dying. Do that. Just make sure to kill yourself afterwards if you can’t handle the effects.

something to write about

I have nothing else to write about so I decided to just post all my major nonsensical thoughts for the day.

• 3:00 AM: “Exorcist” I woke up with this word repeating over and over in my mind. Damn you, horror movies! It took me 30 minutes and a playlist of cheesy boy band songs to get me back to sleep.
• 8:30 AM: “Five more minutes.”'
• 9:00 AM: “Five more minutes.”
• 9:30 AM: “Five more minutes, I promise.”
• 11:30 AM: “Good food, please, good food. No more fish fillets and lumpia…” The food vendor in our pantry kept selling the same dishes for the longest time.
• 11:40 AM: “At last.” This is the time of the day that I’ve always been looking forward to.
• 1:00 PM: “Work, work” The rest are just too boring to post. (As if this is not boring enough.)
• 8:00 PM: “I wish it would rain hard just so these pesky motorcycles would disperse. I wish I also get points for hitting them.”
• 9:00 PM: “Maybe I should sleep early tonight.”
• 9:30 PM: “Exorcist, exorcist, exorcist. Damn you, horror movies! I think I’ll just blog for now”

i heart zombies

Years ago, I wrote about how nice it would be to watch a post-apocalyptic zombie-themed TV series. At last, my prayers have been answered.

I just hope they do it right. Dawn of the Dead, Quarantine, 28 Weeks Later – or anywhere within the range of these 3 will do. Just don’t go as low as Diary of the Dead or the other B-grade zombie movies. .

vanity

I was given a bottle of perfume as a gift. I never was a fan of these so, in my whole lifetime, I think I’ve only tried 1 brand of perfume. It was Polo Blue if I remember correctly. The one I just received, which I actually specifically requested for, is a large bottle of Clinique Happy for Men.Of all the fragrances I’ve encountered, this is the only one that made me say “I want this.” I just love its citrusy smell. Now that I have one, I’m hoping that it will smell nice on me.

 

Vain. Haha… Vanity can be really infectious.

devil

I’m no movie critic. Maybe that is why despite all the negative reviews I’ve read, I still enjoyed The Night Chronicles: Devil. If you like suspense movies, and have money to spare, you may want to check this out.

poems are lame

Magnetic
Nonsensical happiness, endearing
Obsessive urges you incite
Passion, infatuation, adoration and perhaps even more
Effortlessly attractive, you are worth more than you think you do.

An ABC for someone near and dear. I hope I got it right,

* * *

And to you my confused friend: Not everyone stays. I know that - and yet I’m still hoping that you do. You keep me sane.